Nine years have come and gone. Oh, my. I can honestly say I did not see myself this far out following the accident. My sisters said, “9 years … At that time, it was hard to see … the next hour … the next day … the next week … And to see further was very hazy.” I learned throughout my time of two weeks in intensive care, transition to a step-down ICU, 2 months of in-hospital rehab, and finally, 4 months of outpatient rehab that my life expectancy with a spinal cord injury (SCI) had shortened. No one had a specific conversation about that, but rather it came out ‘between the lines.’ I never pushed that information nor did I do any research on it. That’s not like me.
In one of my prior lives, I was in a school district that prioritized professional development and a curriculum that was research and data-driven. As a result, we had a unique, expert, creative, well-recognized team leading district curriculum and staff development. We had experts in reading-language arts, mathematics, science, social studies, gifted, technology, cooperative learning, and effective instruction. Very unusual for a district our size. Our assignments were a combination of full and part-time, but we all shared an office suite in which lots of collaboration occurred. We had a new Superintendent hired with that in place who said his best way of leading was to step back and let us proceed. He supported professional growth for everyone in his leadership team (these curriculum people plus principals and district office staff). One memorable training he brought for us, but we soon realized the power and brought it to the all-staff level, was True Colors. It was based on the Myers-Briggs personality inventories but was simplified and very effective and memorable. Four colors summarized the full spectrum of personalities.
- Blue: feelings, interpersonal strengths, self-awareness, team builders, sensitivity to needs and strengths or others. Learned well with others and in groups where they also were strong participators and facilitators.
- Green: big picture thinking, understanding how ideas interrelate, thriving on learning, wanting to research and learn everything possible on a topic, never finished learning because one interest leads to another, asking questions so -and until- they fully understand.
- Gold: organized, sees what needs to be done and makes a plan to do so, loves checklists, always gets the tasks completed and on time-often early, makes a great secretary.
- Orange: fun-loving and seeing the humor in a situation. Enjoy a good party and are the ones to plan them. Bring joy to the situation.
Everyone has some of each color; it is all about the degrees of each. Key learning: a good group has people with all different strengths and the most effective groups/committees/classrooms have a balance of all.
I’m a green – and weighted a strong green. The fact that I didn’t research the impact of SCI on life expectancy was not part of my character. I guess avoidance was stronger than my root personality characteristics.
Finally, after 9 years, I decided a quick review was in order. Projections varied widely. The initial numbers I saw were wretched. The first year or two are crucial for medical care; physical, occupational, and speech therapy; support systems; and attitude. The wisest piece said it depended on the level of the injury on the spine and the age at which the injury occurred – along with whether the SCI was complete. Well, that is logical and reasonable. However, I still wanted numbers. It followed that without strong support in the above list, too many didn’t live the first year. References to mental health, including suicide, were sobering. The best piece I saw that quantified things a little was to say 80%. Those with a spinal cord injury would likely live about 80% of what they would have done without the injury. I could live with that. For years, I said I would live to 100. I quit saying that after my accident. However, 80% of that is an easy calculation. I could live to be 80. Well, that seemed fine. Then, I recalled that I’m already past 70. Oh, my.
I fully admit that I have not done my typical level of research. The above is definitely based on a cursory review of ready research. I guess, honestly, that I don’t really need more on this topic.
There are no promises in life. It comes with no guarantees. It takes more than fingers on both hands to count the number of our friends and family members, who were healthy 9 years ago – including a range of ages, that have tragically passed during those 9 years. I AM ready to go at any time. It is well with my soul. There are days I’d prefer that it come quickly. It’s my family that I want to watch grow and develop and be there FOR them. My blessings of a wonderful husband-partner-caregiver, time, experiences, people, travel, and on-and-on … have been remarkable, and I feel privileged to have them. I am grateful for days that are full and for lists of worthy projects I still want to complete or accomplish.
Watch for your blessings.
FastHugs 